The Starting Point for this Challenging Adventure was Using a Cane

I was opening my Facebook page when a memory came up for me to share. It was only from a year ago but it showed how far I had come in that year. It was a picture of a cane. It was a small step in my recovery from a stress fracture in my right knee. I was switching from crutches to a cane. A sign that I was on the mend. Yet here I am now almost exactly a year later planning on doing an almost 200 mile run. I had almost forgotten that I had that injury or at least it felt much longer ago.

As I write this I am only a couple of days away from running the length of New Jersey with two friends and a host of family and friends who will volunteer to help. I had been so consumed with the logistics of the run that I had felt that it was an adventure that started when we announced the run at the beginning of 2024. Yet this running journey began a year ago with me on my butt. Unable to walk let alone run.

I was so consumed with the future I had forgotten my roots. Yet now I was intrigued by the journey that was appearing on my Facebook memory.  It seemed a lifetime ago. Yet sometimes that is the way life is. A past experience seems like a different life. I went back to blog I wrote about my feelings and emotions of the injury. I read it to see if it matched what my recollections were.

To my surprise my memory of my feelings and emotions were pretty on point. It was a mix of bravado, determination, and fear. I was also taken by what I told the doctor in his office when he said I had to stop running and use crutches.

“When I run my next 100 mile run or the state of New Jersey again. I will let you know, so that other patients know what is possible.”

Actually, after I did my 100+ mile run in the fall I realized I never did let the doctor know. My mistake it is good for patients to know that complete recovery is possible.

Yet as I prepare to take that first step on my New Jersey running journey I am now taking time to reflect on a journey that I know a few people thought I would not be able to take at my age. Yet there were lessons in that journey that will help me in future hard journeys.

One of the biggest lessons learned was not a new one, but one that I had learned doing ultra-marathons. Break the goals into manageable parts.  Usually running 100 miles seems overwhelming especially when you are feeling a little tired but just running say ten miles to the next aid station is much more doable. Before you know it, the last aid station is five miles away and it means you have attained what you thought was impossible.

With my rehab I did the same thing. I went from crutches to using a cane. Then started walking without one. I also made sure that I was diligent about my physical therapy. I went to Jag Physical Therapy and worked with the staff there to continue my progress not so that I can walk again but so that I could run. This is not meant to be an advertisement for them, but they were a key partner in my comeback. That is because my goal was their goal. They wanted me to run again too.

I still remember the moment one of the physical therapist took me outside to the back of the office and said try and run. It was a moment that scared me. Yet it was an important step that I needed to take. This partnership with them was another lesson. We all need other people to support and encourage us. This is especially true when times are difficult.

After my physical therapy it was a slow ramp up from a 5K to a six-hour trail loop run, a marathon and then a 100 mile run. At each step I was methodical. They were each my next aid station.

There was a third lesson. That is that my rehab was not just on my body, but it was on my brain as well. Physical injuries will affect you mentally as well. I was literally running scared in the beginning. My steps were tentative and I was concentrating on my knee. It took a while before my mind not to think like I was an injured person. That was when I was healed when the mind and body ran together.

If you have ever hiked up a mountain and along the trail there is a great view of the valley below, I am at that stage. You gaze at the valley below with awe because this is why we hike mountains for the view. You also then look for where you started, and it looks so far and you take pride that your legs have taken you so far. I am at that point on my journey. Looking back with a little pride. But now I will turn my head from the valley below to the peak ahead. The journey is not over. I still have to navigate a difficult route before I reach my goal.

After that there is only one thing to do. Send an email to a doctor.

Recognize those Kindness Opportunities

Sometimes practicing what you preach is not always easy. I have recently been preaching that we should all practice the act of kindness more. It was one of my lessons from my first run of the length of New Jersey from its most Northern point the High Point Monument to the Southern at the Cape May Lighthouse. I am again attempting this feat though in reverse from South to North and this time even naming my attempt the New Jersey Kindness Run.

Yet while it seems easy to practice kindness especially with family and friends, often it takes a little extra effort. This is especially true with people you do not know well or who are complete strangers. That is why it stands out. Yet opportunities arise often and almost always unexpectedly.  Those are the times that more is demanded of you. It means doing a little extra.

Those of you who know me know that I love ultra and trail running because it pushes me to do more. Well kindness is the same way. It is not always the easiest path. Yet like running, the rewards are just as significant if not greater. Let me give you an example.

I was working at maybe my favorite type of program at work. It is called the “Unsung Hero” program where we honor students who fly under the radar but inspire their fellow students and even their staff with their ability to overcome obstacles and remain positive. They also are also almost always ambassadors of kindness.

In any case I was called over because the mother and the grandmother of one of the girls being honored had an issue. The grandmother was in a wheelchair and they were going to place them with the other wheelchair attendees which was in the middle of the auditorium but there was an issue. The mother looked at me and said “I am deaf but can’t read sign language (We had a sign language interpreter on stage.) but I read lips. What can you do?”  I immediately looked to the front of the auditorium to see if there were empty seats in the front row. I spied a few and immediately started saying “Yes I will move you to the front row.” When I realized that I wasn’t looking at her so she had no idea what I was saying. I am just a bustling ball of energy using exaggerated body language and not always looking at the person I am talking to. A bad habit I know but, in this case, horrible. While it was an instinctive response I still beat myself up over my lapse.

I quickly gained hold of my senses and looked her in the eye and told her that I have some seats in the front row. I have to admit when you have to stop and look someone in the eye to talk to them without doing anything else there is more of a connection with that person. I felt that with her and knew I had to help her so that she could see her daughter being honored. So, I sat her in the front row with her mother next to her. Not directly in front of the podium but in the front row off to the side. I was rather proud of myself for solving that problem.

Maybe because it was because of talking to her eye to eye, when I had a moment, when I was not doing something for the program. I looked up to the podium to see what I could see from the speakers. Specifically, if I could see their lips. Since I was standing in her vicinity, I was curious about reading lips. To my surprise, while I could see the speakers lip some of the time, the lighting was difficult and the distance and angle made it difficult to see their lips.

So, I walked over to her and looked her in the eyes and said “can you read their lips?” She politely gave a gesture that it was so-so. I didn’t have to read minds then to know that she was struggling.

This was my kindness opportunity. Yes, I had done a lot. Maybe even more than most people. Yet she needed more. We had time since her daughter was not scheduled to be honored until later in the program but I wanted her to enjoy the entire program. So, my coworker and I then moved her to a seat that had been vacated right near the podium. We put her grandmother right up front in front of her. They then enjoyed the program.

I am not telling this story to pat myself on the back. No, but to say that opportunities to show kindness just appear without warning. We really can’t go searching for them. My first act of moving her up front may seem like an act of kindness, but it was really just doing my job. It is when you put yourself in someone else’s position, is when the kindness opportunities arise. When I attempted to read lips on my own.

After the program was over and people were enjoying some refreshments and leaving I saw the woman as she was leaving. She looked at me and said “Thank you” and we hugged and said good bye. We did not know each other’s names and will almost certainly never see each other again. That moment we hugged made me feel so good.

I have written about the power of a finisher medal in races. It makes the pain and difficulty of a race go away. You then start thinking of signing up for another race. That moment with that woman was my finisher medal. When someone thanks you for that act of kindness it makes you feel better about yourself. It doesn’t need to be as dramatic a thank you as our hug was. Maybe just a smile or a nod. It will still have the same effect.

I can tell you with certainty, that kindness opportunities will arise. They may require a little extra effort but when they do. Take advantage of them. You will thank me later.

Battling my Inner Voice

It is not the mountain we conquer but ourselves.

Sir Edmund Hillary

I have run many ultra-marathons and have even run the entire length of my home state of New Jersey from top to bottom, about 196 miles. I am planning on doing this run again. Though this time from the southernmost point to the northern. I have even addressed audiences about my ultra experiences particularly the New Jersey run. In doing so I regale them with the ups and downs of such feats but there is definitely an air of inevitability to the tales. I explain my “why” in these presentations. Which is of believing in challenging oneself. That our greatest personal achievements are accomplished because they were difficult. That I think aging is not slowing down. That we are capable of more than we think.

I do it with an air of confidence. That it is easy. Frankly after several years of this I am not really challenged about my why and my ability to do these running feats at my age by anyone. Except one person. This person will challenge me and say “Bull sh$#@! You are not as tough as you appear. You are getting old and slowing down. You are just in denial.” The confidence that I thought I was oozing evaporates when they confront me. Is it just my male ego (My motto is never underestimate the stupidity of the male ego.) that drives me?  Is it wrong to push myself this way? I also know this person who challenges me knows whether I am being honest or not.

The person who challenges me most about my decisions is – myself. My inner voice that says very often “Don’t do it!” My inner voice has impeccable timing. It waits until I am most vulnerable and weak, then it makes its argument. It waits until the weather turns while I am on an ultra-marathon and going uphill and say “You are getting too old for this.” After I suffered a stress fracture of my right knee it again whispered so that only I could hear. “See it is time to stop this nonsense. You are getting old.” I really hate that he always brings up my age.

This inner voice has good intentions. It wants to protect me from harm. It wants to keep me safe and warm. As I am running in the rain or snow it will whisper in my ear “I hear golf is a great game. Most men your age take it up.” It will point out all the possible dangers.

I will admit that sometimes I will give in to this voice or at least compromise. For example, on one tough trail race I walked the last six miles or so because of a bad pain in my ankle and rather than risk further injury I walked. On another tough race I told my inner voice don’t worry this is my last time doing this. Which I truly meant at the time. Yet when I finished and received the finishers medal my mood changed instantly and soon, I was scouring the web for another race.

That feeling of accomplishment at the end of grueling run is what keeps me going and is also my “why”. You see I have another voice in my head. (Yes, I know you are wondering how many voices do I have? No time to explain that, but for this blog it is just two.) The other voice is a dreamer. It wonders what I can do if I just try. It says you are capable of more than you think but first you have to get your butt off the couch and move. It says don’t wait for the perfect time to do something. The time to do the things you want is now. If you wait for the perfect time, you probably will really be too old.

This inner voice gets louder with every success. Even small successes. When I finished my first ultra-marathon, a 50-mile run. It was not a pretty sight. I was walking slowly at the end. Yet that finisher medal lifted my spirits. That inner voice started to shout over the careful voice. “You see you did it! You know what? I think if you did it again you would do it better.” That voice was right. I took the lessons I learned from the previous run and improved dramatically the next year. You see success breeds more success and confidence.

That inner voice also shouts when things are tough and my other protective voice is saying “You are getting old.” The daring voice is saying “You have faced these obstacles before and persevered. Just keep moving.”

We all have these two voices in our head. One that dreams and one that is protective. Now I am not saying just to listen to that daring voice that dreams. I like to think that I listen to both voices. I am daring but I am not reckless. That protective voice forces me to plan out the big challenges. I am saying listen to BOTH voices. Many of us play life safe and only listen to the protective voice. Our biggest regrets in life are not the things we did but the things we did not do. We wonder what if?

It is not easy following that daring voice because the partner on your journey as you move forward is “failure”. It is always lurking in the vicinity. You are not only facing the challenges of your decision but the possibility that you might fail. Your protective voice always says if you don’t attempt it you can’t fail. Yet you likely can’t have a great accomplishment without facing the possibility of failure.

It is funny when I began this blog I thought I knew what I wanted to say about my “why” but I found that I may have been wrong.  The biggest challenge and obstacle I face is myself. Getting over my fear of failure.  My “why” is pushing myself not to be complacent and settle for the easy path. This is a never-ending battle that happens every day. Just going out for a training run there is a battle among the two voices in my head. It is also not just about running. It occurs in many of my life’s decisions.

Do you listen to both voices?

 

 

 

Why a Kindness Run?

I was coming to the end of my 196 mile running journey. Almost 65 hours which included about four hours of sleep, constantly moving the rest of the time. What was I feeling? Surprisingly it wasn’t fatigue. No, it was a strange emotion. Tears were streaming from my eyes. The run which I had originally done to test and push my body to its limits was something more than a physical and mental challenge. It was a journey of emotions and spirituality as well. It was almost an entire life’s journey in 65 hours that had changed me. The man who started the journey at the High Point Monument in New Jersey’s Northwestern point was not the same man who ended at the Cape May Lighthouse at New Jersey’s southernmost point.

I had taken away many lessons from that journey. Some that I had already knew but were reinforced. Such as that we are capable of more than we think if we give it our all.  Also, aging does not mean slowing down. That we have to have a gritty mindset and keep moving forward even when times are tough. These are all quite traditional American principles. Yet there was one thing that surprised me. That was the power of kindness.

I always practiced kindness because that was the way I was raised as a child. Yet on this running journey I found that kindness has strength and power. Not something we associate with kindness. Every time a friend or family member drove an hour or more just to cheer us on for five minutes, it inspired me and my co-runner Anthony. When strangers who heard about our run cheered us on and encouraged us to go on it gave us strength. When an almost complete stranger who was following my run came to join us in the wee hours of the night. All because I had shown him a random act of kindness seven months before. I was feeling the power of kindness.

Yet after the run and I returned to my everyday life it was harder to see that power of kindness. That is because the cable news channels, and social media trolls, seem to hog all the attention. Even so the power was still there but so was hatred. Something that thankfully, I did not have on my run.

Practicing kindness would seem to be an easy thing to do, but in our society putting down people and being snarky are cooler. That, however, does not make kindness any less powerful just rarer. I also found on this run that people do want to believe in positive news and kindness. They just do it quietly.

When I decided to try this challenge of running the length of New Jersey a second time, this time from south to north. A bit harder feat because you end up going uphill more than in the other direction. I knew that I had to do it with that kindness lesson in mind.

When most people do an endurance challenge like this their message is the traditional American principles that you can achieve most anything you want if you believe and work hard. Also, they usually have a charity they are raising money for. I am raising money for a charity called Dylan’s Wings of Change. Yet something was gnawing at me about the kindness lesson.  It needed to be explored and promoted as well.

As I was on a morning run it came to me. I knew that I needed to ask more from the people who might be following me on this trek. Yes, I wanted them to cheer me on and donate to Dylan’s Wings. (An organization by the way, that spreads kindness.) I need to not only talk and preach about kindness but spread it. I decided that I was going ask people to perform one small act of kindness as well. This is not a hard task, I thought it would be nice if they documented it as well. That way in my tiny part of the world and my small circle of friends and family we have made it a little better place. That is why I call this journey The New Jersey Kindness Run.

If you are reading this blog and thinking of donating to my cause I hope that you perform that small act of kindness and let me know. It does not have to be big. For example, after a recent snowstorm after I was done shoveling my driveway and walkway. I went over and shoveled around my neighbor’s car. That way he could get out easier. Not a big deal, but it did make me feel better. I know that this sounds strange but before I take the first step on this running journey these small acts will inspire me. Kindness always does.

I will admit I am a little nervous about this request. Not because it is difficult for someone to do it. In fact, in my circle of friends and family there are some wonderfully kind people who are already quietly performing acts of kindness on a regular basis. It is just that they do it quietly and probably will want to keep it that way.

Yet if we spread the word a bit more, we can influence those people who keep to themselves too much. We can also change our society’s narrative a bit, that the world is place filled with hatred and negativity.  Some of us must at least try and make people feel more positive about humanity. The way I look at it, one little extra act of kindness is something this world needs a lot more of. After all it is hard to have too much kindness.

Maybe I am crazy and naïve but the only way I will find out is to ask. Please think about it. What is the worse that can happen? Someone rejects your offer. Very unlikely. No, more likely it is that you will make someone feel better. I know that it will make me feel better when I run that you did this.

Produce Jeopardy: What is a Radish?

I had a major decision to make. Do I do self-checkout or go to the cashier with my groceries. I was calculating which would be faster since I had quite a few items including produce which I hate looking up on the screen. I opted for the cashier thinking it would be faster since there was no line. It may or may not have been faster, but it certainly was more entertaining. The cashier was a young college age man who I had not seen at this store before. He was able to deftly handle the fish, meat, butter, potato chips and all those items that have a UPC Barcode.

It is when we got to the produce that things got interesting. He slowed down studying every item. He got to the parsnip and had apparently never seen one of these before. I knew what was coming. He looked at me and asked “What is this?” I said “A parsnip.” I wasn’t surprised, many a cashier is stymied by the not so common vegetables. They want oranges, apples, green beans (Preferably in a microwave bag.) and broccoli. Yet the next one surprised me. He held up my bunch of radishes and asked again “What is this?” I tried to hide my shock and dismay but calmly said “radishes”. The last item was a cucumber. He looked at it. Somewhere in the deep recesses of his brain he had seen one of these before. He was straining to remember. He looks at me and tentatively says “This is a cucumber, right?”  I smile and say “yes”.

I think he burst a button on his shirt when he got that one right. I almost “high fived” him. Maybe I should have found the manager to tell them that they should be commended for hiring such a bright young man who knew what a cucumber was. However, I just left worried about the future of our country or at least our gastronomical future.

I mean I get this often. Many a young person has no idea what certain vegetables are. I wonder what they ate their whole life to never have come upon fresh produce. Do people not cook at home anymore?

I remember years ago I was working with a woman who hated to cook and would serve her son mashed potatoes that came from a box. Yet one day her son who was in first grade looked at her and asked “Mom can you make mashed potatoes from real potatoes?” She was ashamed and scared! She would have rather he asked “Where do babies come from?”  I always wondered what happened to that young man. I hope that he broke the noncooking cycle in his family or a generation of descendants will be raised on boxed mashed potatoes. A sad thought. Tears come to my eyes just thinking about it.

The next day I am in the produce section of a different grocery store. I really don’t like buying produce at this store because it is notoriously bad. Yet I only needed two things that are common one being a green pepper.  When an older gentleman (He looked old to me but the scary part is he was about my age.) asks me “Do you know what a turnip is?”

They are right in front of him but there is no sign. I point to them. He asks “Which is a good one? Which would you buy?” I look them over. The colors are fading and all of them are brown. I picked up a couple and they are squishy. To his dismay I say “None of them. This store is known for its bad produce.”

He goes “My wife sent me out to get a root vegetable for a stew.” He was shaken. I said “Tell her some guy told you not to buy them. Trust me.” Apparently, she suggested a few other items and I showed him the rutabagas and of course the parsnips. While neither looked great they were in better shape than those turnips. I mean someone should have lost their job for leaving those turnips out.

He brings over a yucca and asks me what it is but before I could answer he turns it around and there is a sticker that says “yucca”. “Oh. Will this work?” I said “I don’t know what she is making but it probably wouldn’t. I would stick with the parsnips or the rutabaga.”

I felt like saying “How did you make it this long in life? Being so helpless around food.” I thought about him and before I walked away I was going to make a career suggestion to him. I think he has the making of a good cashier. You will be happy to know that I kept all my wise guy thoughts to myself.

Now I no longer worry about the gastronomical future of our country. It is the present that is the problem.

Sometimes Miserable Conditions are the Ideal Conditions

As I closed the back door behind me and headed to my rental car the cold rain jolted me awake. I was just happy with myself for waking up this early. It was 5AM and it was not just cold and rainy, but it was dark on this December morning. Just seven hours previously I was eating, drinking, and dancing at a wedding. Now I was shedding the suit and tie for my foul weather running gear. I plugged in the address in my GPS and hoped that it would lead me to a trail race. It was dark and I was in the state of South Carolina and had no idea where I was going. I was just obediently following the directions of Google maps. When I got to a long dirt road with a line of cars parked on the side of the road, I knew that I had arrived at the right location.

Some people may question my sanity for squeezing in an early morning trail race immediately following a festive wedding while traveling. Okay maybe a lot of people. Even my wife, when looking at the weather reports was questioning my sanity. I would be running in the dark with cold rain pelting me. Yet when I arrived at the race registration after walking down the dark road I was elated with my decision. My only regret was that I could only do a 10K. Some of these runners had been running through the night and would be completing 50 miles. I was just there for the last four laps. A lightweight boxer surrounded by heavyweight boxers.

The race was called the Longest Night Run sponsored by the Upstate Race Series in South Caroline. This was a backyard elimination race in which the runners started every twenty-five minutes and run a mile and a half. So, you had plenty of time to complete the loop. Very few people would be eliminated. I was there early so that I could see the runners who had been running all night come in a bit wearily but determined to finish. I was a bit envious of their adventure.

Yes, it was cold in the low forties with a steady rain and the enthusiastic man at the registration desk stated the course was slick and muddy. It was dark and even with my headlamp you could easily slip and fall. Yet despite those challenges I was completely ready because I had already overcome the hardest obstacle to the race. That was getting up out of a warm comfortable bed to go out into the cold rain.

Living in North Jersey I am used to running in all different types of weather from rain, sleet, and snow. From single digit temperatures to ninety degrees. While they all bring a different set of challenges, I find that they all can be overcome. While they may all have a different set of challenges, they all have the same first obstacle. That is deciding to overcome the challenges ahead of you. It is not always easy. Despite going out in all types of weather I do hesitate on some days. Pacing the house waiting for some miraculous break in the weather to make my run easier. There are always reasons not to do your run in bad weather. The mind always makes the obstacles seem more ominous than they really are.

The mind is a powerful tool in overcoming obstacles. A positive mindset is key. As I was waiting for our race to start, I was talking to another runner named Steve. He said “Once you start running than the rain doesn’t seem so bad.” He was right. It is also great to have others around you who are positive about taking on a challenge.

Yet it is the mind that sometimes either creates the obstacle or makes it seem more ominous than it really is. Like in overcoming obstacles the people around you can also help strengthen those obstacles even unknowingly. In my case a few people questioned if I was really going to do this race so early and in such bad weather. I could understand their apprehension. Getting up early in bad weather seems crazy while you are ordering another drink at the open bar. While I confidently said yes, the repeated inquiries did weaken my confidence. It is amazing how much negative energy can affect you.

However, when I arrived at the race my mindset changed completely. Let the fun begin! As the man working at the registration table joyously stated. “It is cold, rainy, muddy and dark. You are going to have a great time out there!” He was right. I was also surrounded by people who were relishing the challenge. It is maybe more amazing how positive energy can lift you up.

Once I started running I felt great. I started tentatively because I was unsure of where I was running on the trail in the dark and pretty much followed other runners. I was towards the front of the pack. At a major bend I could see a parade of headlamps behind me and it was so inspiring. To see about two hundred people running in the dark in bad weather. They were all seemingly happy like me to be in this miserable weather. In our everyday society we would have an umbrella or at least rain gear and walk with our heads down trying to survive the miserable weather. Most people’s mood would also match the weather.

When children are very young, say around the age of three, they stomp in puddles and enjoy the wet weather. Often to their mother’s chagrin. Basically, we trail runners have never matured and learned our mother’s lessons. We are still those three-year-olds stomping in the puddles.

When I was running my second loop, I remember how happy I was. I felt so alive! Ironically the thing that made me feel so alive was the miserable weather. No way I could feel this “Alive” on a treadmill! 

The only thing that dampened my spirits was that I was only doing a 10K. Maybe next year I can come back and do fifty miles, I thought.

When I got back to the house we were renting, only my wife was up. The rest were just beginning to stir. She asked me how my race was? I said that it was great. A little muddy but it was a great group. My enthusiasm was obvious. I think that she is getting used to this sixty-four-year-old man coming back from a race like a little boy. She said with a little sarcasm “Had fun spending time with your peeps!”

“Yes, Yes! I did.” I replied. More people should try and enjoy miserable weather and spending time with adult puddle splashers I thought.

 

 

 

 

 

The Journey to the Starting Line

If you want someone to be forthright and completely honest with you. Have a conversation with them while running alongside them. For some reason all those social armors that we put up to protect our own image seem to weaken when we run. So, when we are running alongside someone, we are more open and likely to express our feelings. There is also something safe in being open with another runner. You instinctively know that you are not being judged.

My cynical side believes this is why most people don’t run. It would force them to be open and honest not only with others but themselves. Then again it could be that it takes effort to run.

I know this to be true because I have run alongside many of my fellow runners and have had great conversations with them. I am always surprised at how candid we all are with each other. While I love to listen to people’s epic adventures during a race and have been known to regale others with my own adventures. What I find most fascinating and illuminating is everyone’s journey to the starting line. It is their “why”. Why did they start running and why do they still run.

The reasons are plentiful and diverse. Some to battle drug or alcohol addiction, some in reaction to a bad relationship, some in response to a chronic health condition, military veterans with PTSD, and mothers who just want to clear their head. I know this because one of the questions I always ask a runner especially on a long run is “Why are you running this race?” The stories then burst out.

My own story seemed less dramatic than everyone else’s. It was a midlife crisis and I wanted to get back in shape. I also saw old age ahead and wanted to not be feeble in my later years. However, when I delved deeper into my own motivations and really listened intently to the other runners those diverse reasons had three common themes.

One is that we had lost control of our lives. We needed to get some semblance of control. That might seem obvious for someone with addiction issues, but I could even see it even in my own life. Yes, I had a great family that I adore and a good career. Yet my life’s schedule was centered around my kid’s life and when not them, my work schedule. We all need some time for ourselves. When we run, we control the pace. If it is an hour or thirty minutes, it is time that you are a master of. In a world in which we have no control it is nice to have that control even if it is for a relatively short time.

Second, we are all striving to be a better version of ourselves. We honestly can see that we have faults, and we need to improve ourselves. This is done by getting away from the more negative and sometimes even destructive ways of dealing with our lives. I have heard often from runners that it seemed like a healthier way to combat an issue. While to an outsider it may seem that we are being selfish putting our running higher on our priority list. (I am aware that we runners can get a bit neurotic about running. Because I have myself done that. Ask my wife.) We are giving our life more structure.

Almost every race that I have been at whether it is a 5K, half-marathon, marathon, or an ultra-marathon there is someone who that race, is a defining point.  They are going to run a distance, they never have before. They have worked hard to get there. They are challenging themselves. The risk of failure is also there. Yet when they achieve their goal, they are a changed person.

Yet this better version of ourselves extends to the rest of our life. Once you feel more comfortable and content with yourself, it will extend to other relationships. I know after I completed my first ultra-marathon the feeling was amazing. The confidence that it instilled permeated into all aspects of my life.

Finally running becomes a form of mindfulness. Some people do meditation or yoga to clear their head. Others like me run. At the end of a morning run I feel like I am ready for the day. I have heard some young mothers say this alone time (alone time for a young mother is a rare commodity.) helps clear their head. You may even know a runner who gets antsy if they get out of their running routine and have not run in a while. I know when I was injured once. I was like a caged animal pacing the house needing to feel the comfort of my regular run.

It is amazing to me how running clears my head and I can see the world better. Often a solution to a work problem becomes evident or even a blog appears out of nowhere. I know that this is true for others as well.

After the race starts the journey for everyone is the same. Some runners, as was stated before may have a race that has more significance. While we may go at different speeds the terrain is the same, as is the weather. Some of us arrive well before others but the path is the same. The finish line is the same. The conversations at the end all center around the journey to that finish line.

Yet what drives all of them and even defines them was their journey to the starting line.