Friday, March 1, 2024

Why a Kindness Run?

I was coming to the end of my 196 mile running journey. Almost 65 hours which included about four hours of sleep, constantly moving the rest of the time. What was I feeling? Surprisingly it wasn’t fatigue. No, it was a strange emotion. Tears were streaming from my eyes. The run which I had originally done to test and push my body to its limits was something more than a physical and mental challenge. It was a journey of emotions and spirituality as well. It was almost an entire life’s journey in 65 hours that had changed me. The man who started the journey at the High Point Monument in New Jersey’s Northwestern point was not the same man who ended at the Cape May Lighthouse at New Jersey’s southernmost point.

I had taken away many lessons from that journey. Some that I had already knew but were reinforced. Such as that we are capable of more than we think if we give it our all.  Also, aging does not mean slowing down. That we have to have a gritty mindset and keep moving forward even when times are tough. These are all quite traditional American principles. Yet there was one thing that surprised me. That was the power of kindness.

I always practiced kindness because that was the way I was raised as a child. Yet on this running journey I found that kindness has strength and power. Not something we associate with kindness. Every time a friend or family member drove an hour or more just to cheer us on for five minutes, it inspired me and my co-runner Anthony. When strangers who heard about our run cheered us on and encouraged us to go on it gave us strength. When an almost complete stranger who was following my run came to join us in the wee hours of the night. All because I had shown him a random act of kindness seven months before. I was feeling the power of kindness.

Yet after the run and I returned to my everyday life it was harder to see that power of kindness. That is because the cable news channels, and social media trolls, seem to hog all the attention. Even so the power was still there but so was hatred. Something that thankfully, I did not have on my run.

Practicing kindness would seem to be an easy thing to do, but in our society putting down people and being snarky are cooler. That, however, does not make kindness any less powerful just rarer. I also found on this run that people do want to believe in positive news and kindness. They just do it quietly.

When I decided to try this challenge of running the length of New Jersey a second time, this time from south to north. A bit harder feat because you end up going uphill more than in the other direction. I knew that I had to do it with that kindness lesson in mind.

When most people do an endurance challenge like this their message is the traditional American principles that you can achieve most anything you want if you believe and work hard. Also, they usually have a charity they are raising money for. I am raising money for a charity called Dylan’s Wings of Change. Yet something was gnawing at me about the kindness lesson.  It needed to be explored and promoted as well.

As I was on a morning run it came to me. I knew that I needed to ask more from the people who might be following me on this trek. Yes, I wanted them to cheer me on and donate to Dylan’s Wings. (An organization by the way, that spreads kindness.) I need to not only talk and preach about kindness but spread it. I decided that I was going ask people to perform one small act of kindness as well. This is not a hard task, I thought it would be nice if they documented it as well. That way in my tiny part of the world and my small circle of friends and family we have made it a little better place. That is why I call this journey The New Jersey Kindness Run.

If you are reading this blog and thinking of donating to my cause I hope that you perform that small act of kindness and let me know. It does not have to be big. For example, after a recent snowstorm after I was done shoveling my driveway and walkway. I went over and shoveled around my neighbor’s car. That way he could get out easier. Not a big deal, but it did make me feel better. I know that this sounds strange but before I take the first step on this running journey these small acts will inspire me. Kindness always does.

I will admit I am a little nervous about this request. Not because it is difficult for someone to do it. In fact, in my circle of friends and family there are some wonderfully kind people who are already quietly performing acts of kindness on a regular basis. It is just that they do it quietly and probably will want to keep it that way.

Yet if we spread the word a bit more, we can influence those people who keep to themselves too much. We can also change our society’s narrative a bit, that the world is place filled with hatred and negativity.  Some of us must at least try and make people feel more positive about humanity. The way I look at it, one little extra act of kindness is something this world needs a lot more of. After all it is hard to have too much kindness.

Maybe I am crazy and naïve but the only way I will find out is to ask. Please think about it. What is the worse that can happen? Someone rejects your offer. Very unlikely. No, more likely it is that you will make someone feel better. I know that it will make me feel better when I run that you did this.




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